Funny Golf Quotes

NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 07: Tennis legend Chris Evert and golf legend Greg Norman watch Andy Murray of Great Britain take on Rafael Nadal of Spain during men's semifinal during Day 14 of the 2008 U.S. Open at the USTA Billie Jean King National Tennis Center"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."
Greg Norman

"Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing."
Dave Barry

SAN ANTONIO - OCTOBER 20: Lee Trevino warms up on the range during the second round of the AT&T Championship at Oak Hills Country Club October 20, 2007 in San Antonio, Texas. (Photo by S.Greenwood/Getty Images)

"You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work."
Lee Trevino

"Fifty years ago, 100 white men chasing one black man across a field was called the Ku Klux Klan. Today it's called the PGA Tour."
Unknown

PARIS, FRANCE - 1978: American boxer Muhammad Ali (aka Cassius Clay) speaks during an interview for a French television program 1978 in Paris, France. (Photo by Patrick Riviere/Getty Images)

"I'm the best. I just haven't played yet"
Muhammad Ali comments on his golf game

"Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose."
Winston Churchill

ST. ANDREWS, UNITED KINGDOM - JULY 17: Golfing legend Sam Snead has a laugh during his press conference at St. Andrews 17 July 2000. Snead, 88, will be the oldest among a group of 22 past British Open winners"These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow."

"You've just got one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you've hit it."

"If I had cleared the trees and drove the green, it would've been a great shot."
Sam Snead

HOLLYWOOD - JULY 24: Actor Kevin Costner arrives at the world premiere of Touchstone Pictures' 'Swing Vote' held at the El Capitan Theatre July 24, 2008 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images) "Sex and golf are the two things you can enjoy even if you're not good at them."
Kevin Costner

"The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf."
Bertrand Russell

Tiger Woods of the US holds his trophy after defeating compatriot Rocco Mediate in the sudden death playoff at the 108th U.S. Open golf tournament at Torrey Pines Golf Course in San Diego, California on June 16, 2008. AFP PHOTO / ROBYN BECK "Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."
Tiger Woods

"Show me a man who is a good loser and I’ll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss."
Anonymous  

"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf"
Bob Hope

"If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt."
Dean Martin 

"Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing."
Ben Hogan

"Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five."
John Updike

1992: Senior Pro golfer Chi Chi Rodriguez during a photo shoot in Florida. Mandatory Credit: Scott Halleran/ALLSPORT "The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life."
Chi Chi Rodriguez

"They call it golf because all the other four letter words were taken."
Raymond Floyd

"Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness."
William Wordsworth

For live golf betting we use William Hill, one of the world's largest betting companies.